anxious!!

Every time I try to write something my mind goes blank -.-
I have thoughts though. Mostly, weird ones and dumb ones. I haven't been feeling anxious lately. That is pretty good. I have been feeling zen, way too zen towards things I used to freak out about. Future! I just feel like 'whatever will be, will be' and, although this sounds and makes me feel good I can help but wonder..wait, you have to do things too, in order to not panic later on or not achieve what you want.

Trouble is I have somany things i want to achieve anything and that makes me a "person". All I want to do is preach the gospel,and go out from this country. I can't fully trust my zen state. I am sure it will pass and I'll become anxious about stupid things again. I think when you get older you realize that being worried and stressed out about your future or all your insecurities.
But, I do not think that's the point. I think what happens is one gets worn out and, become to accept the fact that one has to face things, sooner or later, good or bad..happy or sad.!!
 You slightly mold yourself into the system. I am used to being anxious; just wanted to document my zen period, cause well that's rare.





Love,



Zenta